Maybe don't watch Babygirl with your family, but do watch Conclave
Hi everybody happy new year! I don't even know why I'm saying that, it's just one of those kneejerk things we're conditioned to say, I may as well say happy January 6. When I worked the front desk at an office in NYC my fellow admin/work spouse and I would mercilessly mock anybody who reflexively told others to "stay dry" on rainy days. On September 11, 2006 a colleague came into the office and said gleefully to no one in particular, "happy 9/11," then shrugged her shoulders and sort of chuckled at herself and went off to her desk. Work buddy and I lost our minds laughing and every year for 20 years since, one of us has texted the other "happy 9/11."
Anyway this new year feels weird doesn't it? Just kinda bracing for impact in a defensive posture. Which is natural for me as an anxious/depressive person - as my former shrink declared when I said I feel like I'm always negative, negativity is a defense mechanism because it's less vulnerable to express displeasure than pleasure, and is also partially the result of intellectualizing everything. D'oh! So if I was one for resolutions I'd resolve to try intellectualizing my feelings less, but luckily I'm not one for resolutions so I won't do that because I don't want to.
The only resolution I've ever made and kept was when I turned 30 I decided to floss my teeth everyday. Historically I haven't successfully formed new habits that are purely for my own benefit without any built-in accountability to another person. Establish a healthy habit just because it's good for me? Ha ha ha why would anybody do that. But having just turned 41 without dental care for almost 6 years I finally got a cleaning and the hygienist almost cried my teeth were so clean, so my first advice of the year is if you don't already floss everyday, start tonight!! Or as most resolutions go, start...tomorrow. I can't use normal floss without creating a tourniquet and nearly severing my finger, so the only way I've managed to stick with it is to use floss picks, which I feel guilty about because of the waste, but I try to offset that with other behaviors like composting with Garbage to Garden and getting most of my cleaning products from GoGo Refill. If you can use regular floss without losing a digit then g'bless, but if you need amazing picks that aren't the absolute worst for Mother (Earth) check these out.
The other habit I'm committed to forming this year is willingly inviting people inside my house. Wendy and I moved into a new apartment in LA in February 2020, a couple weeks before lockdown, and in the 3 years we lived there had a friend over maybe twice. We've always been a shoes-off home since NYC because duh, but in 2020 entirely stopped sitting on our furniture in outside clothes, so the prospect of anybody coming over and contaminating the couch where I lounge and binge Great British Baking Show at 2am with their worldly pants that have touched a disease-ridden banquette at SUR is just not a prospect my brain has been able to entertain. But if I want to deepen relationships to lay the groundwork for future cohabitation at the apocalypse commune I'm going to have to ease up just a touch, so I bought an assortment of easy-to-clean slippers to offer guests.
We started small by having my folks come over last night to watch Conclave. They both sat on the couch in pants of unknown provenance and I only moderately obsessed over that quietly inside my brain. Conclave is great if you're into a gaggle of gossipy bitchy little priests doing Squid Game at the Vatican, which I sure am!
Tell me what you're watching and liking or hating in the comments! And I have so much pent-up advice to give so please ask away by DMing on instagram or submitting a question via my website below. It can be about hair, politics, relationships, work drama, pop culture, whatevs! My self-diagnosed ADHD means I know a little about a lot and can solve everybody's problems but my own wheeeeee!
Love, Caroline
Submit advice questions here: https://www.carolinemitgang.com/about